Practice

 
This morning Dave and I woke up early to walk 5 miles in preparation for the Peachtree on Wednesday. We usually walk ~ 2-3 miles at least 3x per week, but we wanted to see how I would handle the longer distance in the heat before we attempted it far from home. Turns out I can do it with energy to spare! We stopped at about 5.3 miles and I felt great. I'm excited about walking on Wednesday, and the heat should hopefully be about ten degrees cooler (though the humidity might increase by then).

The rest of the day has consisted of reading, eating, and a nap in the AC. I woke up with pretty extreme rib pain. Is baby's head stuffed underneath my rib cage? It hasn't really gone away though I've been trying to extend my rib cage and give him more room...

Oh the joys of third trimester!

Jobs

I woke up this morning thinking about the jobs I've had/almost had over the past two years. Fall of 2010 I was in the final interviewing stages of a research position with a private public health company. I failed to answer one simple question with promptness and assurance: "Why do you want this job?" Well, of course that's an easy answer: "Money!" Unfortunately, that's actually what my brain thought to say. Luckily my mouth didn't follow suit, but it did sidetrack me enough to sputter through some harebrained response. I wasn't prepared to be interviewed during this phone call. Why not? I thought a secretary was calling me to make flight arrangements. In a brief, dazzling moment, my shining star fell into a black hole, never to be seen again. Two months of waiting later, I didn't get the job. I couldn't believe that after hours of interviews, one simple moment of stupidity could erase all the good I had accomplished.

So I applied to a Masters of Public Health program. Which I got into. And got an assistantship. And a scholarship. It was free, and I was getting paid to go to school. How lucky! I started January of 2011. I hated it. I had quit by the end of February. What they didn't tell you on the school's website was how they don't believe an individual is responsible for their own actions, and only society and regulations can affect change in public health. I believe in health. But as I was interested in health from a psychological perspective, I knew I couldn't abide by this mindset. Besides the fact that the professors were stupid and arrogant. My fellow students uninteresting. I was unable to drink the kool-aid, sotospeak, and I was angry every day from what I learned and read. I don't regret leaving, but I do wish I had found a different program to be a part of.

Spring of 2011 I got an internship at a veteran's job placement company. I did so well that they let me go because I finished my work too quickly and too well. They thought I would be bored talking to veterans all day. I had ideas for that place and was dedicated to my work because of my husband and his friends. I was excited about going to work each day. It was a blow to leave that job.

Summer of 2011 I started work as a nanny to a 3 month old and started my own business. I quit nannying when I found out I was pregnant, because I wanted to focus on my own body and child. My business is now neither growing nor failing, though I am sure I could do more for it. I like the creativity involved. I just don't really know how to own a business and make it grow.

Where does this leave me? Wondering if I should pursue other jobs. Knowing I want to be a SAHM and not stick my child(ren) in daycare. Wishing I earned more money to help out David.

That's all. I'm excited for my job as a mother. I look forward to it every day. I love taking care of the house and David. And I know that my life isn't over, that maybe just cause I haven't started a career yet doesn't mean I won't ever.

Try as we might...

This weekend has certainly been a trying one, yet still wonderful at the same time.

Friday night I'm preparing to go to an art show with Jen$, and Dave goes to get the mail. We get a letter from Gifts from Grace, my OB practice, which we assume is a bill. Well, I wish it had been a bill. Turns out my midwife has "departed" from the practice very suddenly. It took me years to find her. I am 9 weeks away from my due date. Needless to say, I felt a little stressed. I'm still unsure what I'm going to do. I like the doctor with the practice well enough, but I'm just not sure we're as in tune as I was with Diane Tandy. Maybe she's practicing elsewhere now? I guess we'll see. I have an appointment on Tuesday.

Jen$ and I drive to the art show in Inman Park. As we're exiting the car, she locks her keys in the trunk. We share an "oh no" moment as the skies burst open with heavy rain drops. We're unsure exactly where the gallery is, so we stand underneath an awning for a minute, gathering our thoughts. Luckily, later in the evening, Jen$'s cousin and Dave come to the rescue. Meanwhile, we proceed to thoroughly enjoy ourselves looking at the art and going to Sauced for a bite of food after the show. I enjoyed running into an old friend that I hadn't seen in 8 or 9 years, a friend of my ceramics teacher at Marist. Boy do I miss making ceramics!

Yesterday Dave and I went to a friend's pool party, which was just wonderful, in celebration of my friend earning her PhD in Psychology! I miss studying psychology! I've really enjoyed getting to know Lisa and Gary, but the sad news of her graduating is that they might move to Pennsylvania in a couple months... I guess we'll see. She might have an offer here, at GaState, but that's where she got her degree and I've heard it's important to vary your affiliations with schools. The only stress on Saturday was that driving to the party, two people in a row ran stop signs and almost hit me and Dave. That and I spilled an entire drink on myself right before we left our house. Are my hands getting clumsy from the Relaxin coursing through my body? I love that the pregnancy hormone that relaxes your joints is called "Relaxin." What an appropriate name.

Off to church!

Lane Peaches

I am convinced that the only type of peach to consume is from the Lane peach farm... driving back from Ponte Vedra this week my father graciously stopped any time I wanted to let me use the bathroom... and we actually used rest stops (Dave and I always pull off to a gas station, which doesn't really make much sense when you think of the purpose/ease of rest areas). Well, the one inside the border of Georgia of course had information about peaches and was featuring Lane peaches. Turns out I was already a fan. I had bought several early peaches this year, and all were horrendous & mealy or would never ripen... but when I would babysit, Kim would have delicious peaches and they were the Lane brand. So I went searching for those specifically, and not one has disappointed me. Then I pick up a brochure from the rest stop stand, and Lane has a giant farm with peaches, strawberries, pecans, and pumpkins... They feature homemade ice cream, family fun, July 4th events, a corn maze in October, and so much more! I am terribly excited that I already have a little scooter on the way so that I have an excuse to drag David south of Macon to attend these events.

Baby boy is getting so big that now he sticks his feet in my rib cage, the purpose of which I am sure is to tickle me from the inside, which I can do nothing about! Last weekend I was feeling some intense pelvic pressure, making it a little hard to walk at times, but luckily he must have shifted positions cause now I only get it if I sit in one spot too long. He hiccups almost every day; he must be getting really ready to breathe on his own! I read somewhere that they can cry in the womb, but I'm sure he's not doing that. What could he possibly be sad about? The fact that he has to wait until next year to watch the next season of Mad Men?

Garden update

This is what our garden looked like at the end of March:

Two months later:

from left to right: mojito mint, Better Boy tomatoes, cucumbers, strawberries

Cherokee Purple tomatoes and Thai basil

watermelon patch! this will grow to cover the rest of the side lawn...

Brandywine tomatoes

sweet basil & bell peppers

from left to right: raspberry, blackberry, & blueberry bushes

And the Perennial garden (which needs some weeding): 

Apparently daisies really like to spread, so I imagine our daisies will be huge next year!

Best Pre-Baby Vacation Ever

I know most people go on their "babymoon" as a second honeymoon, but I think Dave and I lucked out going to Ponte Vedra Beach with my dad. We stayed at the Sawgrass Marriott (think the Players tournament). It was a very nice hotel on a lagoon with access to the Cabana Beach Club. I'm pretty much ready to move down to Jacksonville and belong to that club. We sat on the beach all day, watching the Atlantic surf and feeling the breeze cool us off... plus a snack shack and large pool right there. We had a very funny time together, playing miniature golf, walking on the beach, stuffing our faces with delicious food, and watching the US Open.

We've actually been lucky enough to go on two beach vacations this year. Dave's parents took us to their beach house in Long Boat Key in March, where Jenna and Jacob met us for the weekend. We kayaked, did a puzzle, went to a Braves spring training game in Tampa, watched Ninja Warrior incessantly, and cooked delicious dinners. As it turns out, I like going on vacations with parents! Especially to the beach!

Sign me up any time there's an opportunity to see the water and be in the sun! Baby boy certainly enjoyed the relaxation time too... it'll be wonderful when three generations are playing in the sand!

First Tomato

Dave and I enjoyed our first tomato from the garden today at lunch. And that's a cucumber from the garden too! We shared our first cucumber with our next door neighbors at their Memorial Day cookout. The Better Boy tomato (heirlooms are comin'!) was as delicious and buttery as it could be. It was hard not to gobble it all up too quickly.

The garden must be enjoying all the mulch from the giant oak we cut down since the weeds think it's a great place to grow as well. There are new weeds this year that are popping up everywhere. Where do they come from? The weed fairy? But we're getting a lot of crop and the plants look strong. The last time our garden was this good was the year I met Dave, when he spent most of his time over at my apartment and didn't weed or worry over his garden too much. The last few years when we've kept up with it all the garden has gotten bugs and blights and small production. Maybe weeds are a sign of fertility?

The Braves won last night! It was a great game. We got runs out of a walk, a balk, and a catcher error. Heyward was the star of the night. Beautiful night in the 70s, right up close to the field, they retired Smoltz's number, and then there were Friday night fireworks (thank you Publix!)... so all in all a great American Friday night.

Now I've got to go get pretty for the party tonight!

Maternal Worries

Yesterday I popped on over to my midwife's office (they're up in Alpharetta) because of some unusual cramping. It had just gone on too long, and my mother and aunt were right, I'd rather have some peace of mind and not spend the weekend worrying (even though I had an upcoming appointment on Tuesday). Before little boy started kicking all the time, I used to worry that he could just be, well, not alive in there. Even though that makes no sense. I guess I just wanted to prepare myself for the worst. Which brings me to wonder, what's going to happen when he's out of my womb, breathing air and fending for himself without my constant help? Am I just going to have to sit there watching him breathe all day and night? Somehow I don't think that's going to work!

Turns out everything is fine, of course. No premature labor at all. They did an ultrasound to double check, and I thought I was going to be able to see little boy again, but I was not! I only got to see the outline of his little skull. He's head down right now, yay!, but somehow I don't think he'll stay that way for the next few months. But anyway, I was really disappointed when I didn't get to see him. It's been about two months since my last tummy ultrasound, and I wanted to see how much bigger he was, and if he looked more like a human than a monkey at this point. Boy I hope so! I also realized how much I miss him. I'm never going to be closer to him than I am right now, but I don't get to see him or hold him! And I want to!

Apparently the length of your pregnancy tends to run in families. At lunch yesterday with my mother and grandmother I learned that all of my grandma's babies were early (2-4 weeks) and my brother and I were both early too. I wonder if that means little boy will be here sooner than we think? Each pregnancy is different, so there are of course no guarantees, but I just have this feeling he'll be here the beginning of August. I will laugh in the late August heat if I am wrong! His due date is my grandma's birthday, so maybe he'll grace us that day just to prove a point!

We felt little boy hiccup for the first time last night. Dave came into the room after some video game playing and asked me if he was awake. I said yes, he is, he's making these little movements. I didn't even think too much more about the rhythmic little beats until Dave, with his hand on my tummy, said, "I think he's hiccuping!" It lasted a couple of minutes and felt like a heartbeat in my belly. What a funny sensation! I love knowing that he's growing more and more accomplished as a regular human being.

This weekend we have plans galore. Tonight we'll be at the Braves game with the Johnstons. Row 12; I hope we're behind the netting! They smashed through the Miami Marlins, so I wonder if we have the stamina to win tonight as well. I hope so. It's so much more fun to go to a winning game than a losing one. As long as we don't get creamed I'll be happy.

Saturday is my cousin's engagement party. A fancy shindig at my aunt's house (the oldest one, not my cousin's mother). Luckily Boo Johnston bought me a wonderful dress to wear! I have some sundresses given to me by some very generous friends that are done with their maternity clothes, but it's just not the same as having your own nice dress to wear (and one that fits specifically you!). I shall venture out in heels but plan on bringing flip flops just in case. I'm looking forward to the opportunity to spend more time with my cousin and her fiance. I've only met him once, but he seemed like a very nice guy.

Sunday we're meeting with our doula. I'm quite excited to talk about our birth plan, and hopefully Alice will have some inside information into North Fulton Hospital. She's already expressed approval at how mom-friendly the hospital is supposed to be. I'm not surprised since the practice I go to is very natural and amiable. My midwife had 86% of mothers give birth naturally last year! Incredible!

Ender's Game

Do you think that baby, suspended in anti-gravity water, thinks to himself, "the cervix door is always down"?

Picture Time

Today is my first official day of my third trimester! Baby has been celebrating by being awake and moving around a lot this weekend. The garden celebrated by producing tons of fruit: strawberries, raspberries, and blackberries. The blueberries trickle in. We might have enough for 1 1/2 blueberry pancakes. This weekend has been great weather-wise. Temps in the 70s, nice breezes, sunny... today is a little downcast, but that's OK since I need some rest. I feel a little empty in terms of energy. I love running around being busy, but it takes its toll on me since I started growing another human being inside of me. I really enjoy my weekends with David. We have a great time together and with family and friends. It can be nice to be getting stuff accomplished with him and slowing down just to enjoy some relaxation time.

The nursery is almost complete. We need a diaper pail and to hang pictures... oh yeah, and the baby! I can't wait til he gets here!

The crib we ordered online and put together. The tiger is a stuffed animal I've had since high school. The rocking chair was in Dave's family that we refurbished to look nice again and be sturdy. The table by the window was the craft table David used to play on as a child. We got the chest of drawers from a used furniture store called Boomerang. The lady there finds great deals and then retouches the furniture if it needs a facelift. Someone let some naughty kitten in the room while I was trying to take pictures.

Our beautiful changing table was a present from my mother. The couch has been in Dave's family for a while (I believe it used to be at their mountain home). We need a new bookshelf (that thing will probably fall on the child at some point if we don't replace it), but the books are old and new from my childhood and beyond... The walls are freshly painted thanks to our friend/master craftsman Gary, and that cute little elephant chalkboard was a wonderful find at Desperate Housewares, my favorite place to shop for all things household besides Tuesday Morning. The gay guys who run that place are fantastic. Also, can you see the magnificent new carpet? Doesn't it look deliciously soft and perfect??